Status and Standards

Ecclesiastes 4:9

I was really inspired and amazed how God works in every relationship, especially if it is a God-centered one. Why? Here are some points that I’ve learned in our previous Singles’ Night, with the remarkable speakers from the church whom you will really be inspired with. (Sana andun ka :D)

To be honest, I was in a relationship with someone who doesn’t have the same faith as mine. You know what? I thought I can “change” them to believe to whom and what I believe for. Well, someone adapted my faith and even joined a ministry in their church. I was grateful and overwhelmed. But when we broke up, I learned that little by little, he turned his back again and do what he used to do before, proving me that “we” are not the one who can change them, but, GOD. We can be the vessel for the changes, but always remember that ONLY GOD CAN CHANGE THE HEART OF HIS CHILDREN. Yes, we must be changed by heart, and not only because of the worldly things that we wanted.

So here are some points that I’ve taken from our previous church discussion:

1. The purpose of Marriage is to Glorify God.

When a family pursue Christ and live in His ways, we honor God. Also, a god-centered marriage not only becomes a blessing to the spouse but also to the people around them. God’s desires for our marriage is to be a blessing, He is most delighted and honored when we allow marriage to bless others around us. Moreover, isn’t it better that once you have your children, there won’t be this argument if “which service you will attend”?

2. Let us “not” keep in our mind that we are still incomplete and need to find that special someone who will complete us. Well, even though this was my “motto” (I’m not looking for someone to complete me coz I’m already complete by myself) since I’ve got separated with my previous one, it became clearer to me that night.

We are already complete because God is the one who completes us!

From self-centered reasons to God-centered one, coz yes! He is more than enough.

3. Seek and Pray.

Pray for your heart. If you’re still not ready or haven’t moved on yet from your past relationship, OR still have these hopes that there will be another chance waiting at the corner, well, you MUST sincerely pray for your heart. Pray for healing, pray for acceptance, pray for wisdom. God will surely give you the accurate answers from your doubts. AND once you’ve got the answer, LISTEN. Hmm hmm? I know there will be this “another” voice that will tickle to your mind -- “Lord sya nalang”. I know it is difficult to move forward, especially when you’ve been in a serious relationship with your past, been there my love. But always listen to our Creator because He always have someone better for us. Someone we can be together in Glorifying Him.

Talk to each other so you can both pray for your hearts. (They also suggested to give some time in the Prayer season, give 3 to six months devoting to wait for the right call from God).

Seek for guidance from your Pastor/Church leaders, and of course, blessings from your parents. J

4. You should have a good friendship first to that “someone”.

Well this is also one of the important factor we need to encourage to everyone (whoa, I’m not preaching here, just sharing what I’ve learned).

Getting to know each other, knowing and accepting you from your positive and negative sides, (that’s lovely though) Walang biglaan pag kasal na. And I guess that was one of the reasons why there are lots of separations and divorces happening around us. Some says “He/She is not like that when we are not married yet, he/she changed a lot”.

As I’ve observed, well, I won’t go that far, my Mom and Paps are proof of having a good friendship even before my Paps decided to court my Mom. They’ve been in ups and downs before courtship begins. How lovely it is. <3

But, we need to consider some points if we want to be friends with that “someone”

• Be friends with her wholeheartedly and not only because you have this hidden plans to court her. Same with girls. HAHA!

• Don’t be possessive even during the friendship “season”. Let everyone go inside your circle to join you! He/she is not yours in the first place anyway.

Ask God if where your friendship will lead you, and if will lead you to courtship, always remember that courtship means seeking God more than the person you pursue. However, of course there will be these instances that you are really not meant to be. . . ACCEPT it wholeheartedly. It doesn’t mean that the courtship failed, instead, God gave the right direction for both of you.

5. Don’t make it too long to be in a GF/BF status.

Remember, you prayed for it, so no need to prolong the big day!

Well, to be honest, I told to myself before that I will only marry my partner only when we reach 3 to 5yrs in a relationship. Hmm, that’s longer than what it should be! Hahaha!

6. It is better to be single than to marry the wrong one. It's better to wait long than marry wrong.

Love is patient

There are lots of broken relationship nowadays because of unplanned marriage or, yes, let’s say “peer/family pressure”. But no! don’t let your children suffer on the wrong decisions that you will make.

Love (marriage) involves a commitment of all one’s life, emotions, and thoughts. Love, does nothing half-heartedly. <3

So, hello to my fellow singles! This is our season, know what God has called us to do in this season and go about accomplishing it. Don’t rush sabi nga. :D